An Omen for Medicine: Devastating but Motivating

This past week has been a devastating one for my family and me. There is nothing that can possibly compare to the terrible feeling of the loss of a loved one, especially a loss so sudden and heart-wrenching. Although I will not share with you all the details of my uncle's death, I will tell you that his death occurred after a brave decision to stand up to a rare genetic form of cancer.  After a preventative surgery meant to save his life, my uncle endured many complications and his body could not simply keep up. As an aspiring surgeon, my first emotions were complete frustration and disappointment.
 How could a "world-class" surgeon, specializing in the particular surgery, conducting countless amounts of research on the surgery, traveling internationally to conduct the surgery, allow this to happen? What happened that made this surgery turn fatal? Why weren't more tests, labs, procedures done to prevent this? Why couldn't they save him?  It almost makes me feel helpless; if the best surgeons in the world couldn't even help, what makes me think that I, as a future doctor, would even have a chance at making a positive medical impact on people?  Of course, I still have much to learn about the unfortunate encounters in medicine. Truthfully, although we may not want to believe it (myself included) sometimes doctors can only do so much, they are not super heroes or God. I often forget that. It just seems like something more could have been done for him. I'm sure the care he received was some of the best and I know I do not know all the crucial details, but it still did not numb the feelings of aggravation I initially felt toward medicine at this time.
Additionally, my feelings were filled with sympathy and grief. The entire family was beside themselves. My heart aches for my uncle's close family especially my aunt, cousins, and my uncles' brothers and mother. A surgery that was meant to be a positive life-extending procedure turned negative quickly.
Ironically, my uncle played a huge role in landing me my first medical research job a few years ago where I worked on studying particular proteins concerning cancer research. With his help, he may have helped shape me into the physician I hope to be one day and for that, I will be eternally grateful.
If nothing else positive has come out of this sad turn of events, it has ignited an even stronger motivation for my pursuit in becoming a doctor. It has given me a deeper reason for my path in life, raising my guard and inspiring me to give the greatest care possible for my patients one day.
Thanks for the guidance Uncle Patrick, hopefully I make you proud one day! Love you forever!

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/buffalonews/obituary.aspx?n=patrick-j-reilly&pid=174976726